Enough. A Battle in Motherhood.

Let’s imagine that you and I are sitting at a little coffee shop, chatting over our caramel macchiatos…just catching up on life. At which point we delve into the topic of motherhood. For me, this is such a huge part of my fight with feeling like I am enough…and I would venture to guess that this is the case for a lot of moms. What would your advice be if this were the topic of conversation? Do you struggle with the same things? Do you constantly fight the battle of feeling as though you are enough for your kids? I would LOVE the chance to be able to talk to each of you about your journey through motherhood. Here is a little bit of mine.
 

It is a lot of pressure to be a mom…I mean, haven’t you heard? We are raising the leaders of tomorrow!! This is pressure, people! For me, that pressure immediately makes me feel as though I am lacking…and I’m not talking about lacking a little here and there, but rather lacking in a HUGE way.  

There have been so many days in the last four and a half years where I have felt like a complete and utter failure. So many days, where I look back on the whole day and just see situations where I could have done so much better; where I keep having to take a breath deep so I don’t lose my cool, or where I accidentally do lose my cool..so many days where I feel like its just such a losing battle and I will never be enough…enough for my kids or enough for my husband.

It is after those times, that I realize, those moments, bring about some of the best lessons – both for me and for my girls. It is those moments that teach me, form me, and grow me into a better mom. Also, after those times, I realize that my girls, more than anything else, need someone to love them. Unconditionally.  I cannot do more than to start each day striving to and praying for the strength to choose love in each situation that is placed before me. I cannot do more than to try not to repeat the mistakes of the day before. I cannot do anything more than bring my girls to the Lord in prayer and let them be His for the day….to accept my position as a tool of Him, rather the one who is charge of making everything happen. I am enough for my girls, just as I am. I am not perfect, but I am enough.

-A